Upon some reflection over the past few days, I think it is presence.

Being there for others physically is very important. The language that only the body can speak is crucial in certain situations and circumstances. That settling stature when calm is needed to overcome a tempest. Rolling up the sleeves and getting after it with the team to help lessen a stressful load.

A firm, loving, parental engagement when discipline is called for and correction is needed. A hand on the back, an arm around the shoulder or a smile when the feces hits the fan. Joining in with your own lame, success dance when things exceed expectations.

As a leader, it is crucial that others get to know you in this fashion. From the outside in. Authenticity is meant to be just that. Anything feigned on the outside will only reveal what is actually going on within. The two cannot be at odds with one another.

Quite literally, “what you see absolutely has to be what you get.” Any acting on the part of a leader will be seen precisely as that. A dishonest delivery will be seen by all. This isn’t about the academy taking notice. It is about supporting, affirming and growing those around you.

That being said, a leader must possess an equally visible, palpable and honest appearance in a somewhat metaphysical or spiritual sense.

We all operate and are guided by a personal philosophy. A foundation that was poured as we were raised, renovated by every experience encountered and reinforced by how we chose to respond to them. From a leadership standpoint, the bar then gets raised substantially. For how we see ourselves is largely going to dictate how we view others and what we see in them.

If you are convinced that you know it all, have to control everything and that no one on your team can do it as well as you, those around you will recognize that approach in you. The terse tone, the commanding body language, direct sentence structure and the development of leadership cliques will make your “style” quite apparent. Unless you recruit a group of indivudals that have no sense of value or worth, have been shamed their entire existence and are willing to be bullied, then you can pretty much hang up your leader hat.

A leader recognizes that his time is temporary. That he or she will move on to another challenge or different phase of life. That being said, it is incumbent on the leader to learn of the talents and aspirations that surround them, and acknowledge what they lack themselves so that all can contribute in a genuine and lasting way to the growth and success of the group. And one another.

This tone, the open body language, inclusive sentence structure and coaching of leadership radiates through all. The genuine care and support are felt not only within the group, but ripples out. Those on your team express their gratitude and experience to others, funneling potential recruits towards the group. They not only want what is best for themselves, but they also want the same for others in their lives.

This is humility plain and simple.

An admission that I am in need of all of you to achieve what it is we set out to do. I am not able to do this alone. I do not have the talents, skills and drive that we have together. And I am not going to be here forever. Ultimately, my “job” is to help you to grow into a position that you can all work and learn to lead yourselves.

Without me.