Tag Archives: love

It’s all in the eyes.

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Daily writing prompt
Where do you see yourself in 10 years?
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Well, I think I am already on the way.

Dad, guessing at about my age today.

Me.

Got the goatee goin’, can’t say the same for the hair.

Ten years from now?

Well, first off, I am starting to get that sense for taking more of all of it in, like he did. Its like a recalibration of sorts. Very subtle in nature. He was a guiet, old soul. Spoke only when warranted and needed. Quietly acted on others needs. Dynamics being what they were, I allowed them to assume control and didn’t expend the effort needed to know him better. A very tough lesson to come to grips with at this time in my life.

There are others too, their origins now becoming more apparent. No point in resentment or excessive rumination. Awareness, understanding and acceptance will suffice. Nothing to be excised, that just isn’t possible. They can just take solace and company with the slides, college papers and photos in the storage bins in the basement.

Now I can make the most of this moment and today. And as I surmised on my delinquently posted prompt from yesterday, I intend to fully engage in this again if given another tomorrow. There is so much to “be” right now, I can’t waste it by looking ahead. Or allow anything from before misshape and misconstrue today.

He is emitting this wonderful sense in his picture. “Vibe” doesn’t do a man from his time justice. Let’s say energy. Maybe there is a better term. His posture and eyes go together. All natural. Like “I got this”.

Mine?

You can see it was posed. Some rigor mortis. Not there yet. Remains a work in progress.

But I am ok with that. Things are coming around. Maybe it takes another ten years. A couple more after that ? Perhaps the timer goes off before hand. No clue. But however that transpires, I will keep working at it. My aim is to get to whereever he was in this picture in their kitchen.

There is a warmth despite being such a stoic. A sense of acceptance. True peace and serenity there, all for the sharing. I think towards the end, he found that his life was not only good. But right there, it is good.

You can just tell.

It’s all in the eyes.

Connecting with everyone I can.

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Daily writing prompt
What are 5 everyday things that bring you happiness?
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Well, waking up each morning is certainly dandy.

I will continue to appreciate that gift for as long as I am able and given it. No matter the current state of mind, body or soul, just getting to do that is a great start. Then, you get to make the most of it after that. And if things work out, you will get another.

Once I get things situated so my best friend has all she needs to teach and lead for the day, I get to head to church for communion service or mass. An opportunity to just sit and take in all I have been gifted, with an attitude of gratitude. Gather in a sense of belonging to something much bigger than myself with all those around me. Talk about happiness.

Through my vocation, I get to engage happiness in many forms It might be I n the form of job development for individuals with diverse abilities. Coaching basketball and power lifting for Special Olympics provides a limitless supply of happiness. Throw in some football coaching in the fall, and then it comes at me from all directions.

Once her day is over, teaching is done, and mediation determines the menu, we get to make dinner together. We try all sorts of different dishes, whatever just so happens to be the flavor of the day. These recipes are always two plus servings worthy, and great eaten cold, right out the fridge the next day or so. But the best part is that we can do it together. Mingle in some dancing and that takes happiness to the next level, joy.

Lastly, the interaction which guarantees pure joy, is being able to connect with my kids and grand kids. We might get a group text for a movie or game that lasts through the night. the latest video of Cal taking steps, Molly laughing or Amelia running with the football. Might just be catching up some afternoon at home, over dinner, on a walk or simply talking on the phone. Any way we do it and go brings this one joy.

So if you take a step back and take a second glance, you will find that ach of these examples are contingent on one main ingredient. The source of all happiness and the pure joy which follows.

Connection.

Sure, there might be an aspect of these examples that can bring me happiness just because I get to do them. But if they do not involve another in some shape way or form, then where does that get you?

Does taking a walk alone or working out at PF lack connection? Not in my estimation. In the former, you are experiencing a neighborhood, house by house, yard by yard. At PF, there is eye contact, “are you using this?” or absorbing the energy of another in how they work out.

Even now, as I peer out the kitchen window and rap this out, what sense of happiness or joy would it provide if I merely added the last period, closed the Chromebook, turned off the mouse and put ’em in the drawer?

So that being said, what are the five everyday things that bring you happiness?

Connecting with everyone I can.

And just did the math,

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Daily writing prompt
Describe one positive change you have made in your life.
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Upon some early morning discernment, I would have to amend this proposition slightly. Bet you never would have guessed that. Uncharted territory for this stoic. You can insert the “but I digress” comment throughout this share as you wish. You’re gonna need it.

In actuality, the one positive outcome in my life has been the sum of the intention to make several changes. I am no math whiz, but an aggregate of this scope doesn’t just appear of its own volition. The equation is far more complicated than that.

Outward appreances may suggest some well defined substractions in thought, word and deed would produce the desired result. But if something is excised and removed, what is intended to be added to fill that vacuum? If that space is allowed to remain empty, just about anything can come along and fill it up. Or worse yet, start to crowd, overtake and suffocate those that bring with them a positive, affirming and fulfilling presence and power.

What then may occur is that “anything” can begin to multiply. Serving to divide one not just from others, but ultimately, from oneself. Faster than you can say “Bob’s your uncle”, it can appear from all angles, consuming more area, turning what was once a positive, into an all encompassing negative. The arithmetic of despair, failure and isolation.

That being said, I needed to go about this with a mindset of arraying a singular, solid and linearly compatible path forward. Simple geometry. As much as possible, going from point A to point B. Rest areas may be encountered. But I choose to remain on this tangent, having been beaten by my prior paths.

First and foremost, by adding faith back into the equation of my life, I no longer feel the urgency to control and command. At one point, I literally felt chased away from it, But now, t listen and heed the call to reengage and return to the fold. No longer do I carry a sense of abandonment and isolation. They were subtracted from my life.

This awakening led to recognizing and confronting my compulsion to overfunction, its origins still not fully known or understood. But now, I can now let go, bringing with it a sense of peace and serenity. Just being fully present creates an atmosphere for the amazing to be recognized and take place. Acceptance of the prior and its brutal lessons provided, enjoined with that of what will be, lets me feel free to be. No more acting like the divine. Just allowing and embracing it.

Subtracted my tendency to engage with others – personnally and professionally – that felt it their place to determine my value and worth. But more importantly, recognized the frequency and dependency of allowing that trait to rule my world. I determine that product, and have come to realize that multiplying my esteem in a healthy fashion keeps the sum a positive.

Lastly, being controlled by the urge to speak your mind at all times, as diseased and dysfunctional as it was, only serves to divide, and never ever conquer. Listening is all inclusive and powerful for all parties. Joining one to all, in all and for all. A lost art that I now treasure like no other.

Faith, letting it be, genuine self-affirmation and using both ears to become connected to all hearts and souls, turned out to be the precious integers I needed to create one positive change.

To live.

It took several classes.

But the lessons stuck.

And just did the math,

It takes the crown.

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Daily writing prompt
What book could you read over and over again?
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Intriguing.

The one that takes the crown?

Probably the winner by a longshot when my four kiddies were growing up. Some others may have dipped into double digits. Suess, Silverstein, Milne. But this one by far the fav.

I liked Michael Crichton. Jurassic Park – the book – was way better than the movie. Some of his others were fun reads – Prey and Congo were good too.

Version 1.0.0

Multiple reads all. Now Weir’s “Project Hail Mary” is on the night stand. Loving that one.

Henri Nouwen, “The Return of the Prodigal Son” and his team effort “Compassion” with Douglas Morrison and Donald McNeill are gonna be do overs many, many times.

There is another one, to be named later, that correlates well with some of my light reading via the Bible. Light because it is making things about my life shine for once.

Reading that used to be a word salad to me for some reason. But now the two read in tandem seem to act as code talkers, to decipher things for this Stoic. The connection between the Old and the New is fascinating, as is delving into the origins of the words, why those particular ones were used in that moment and why we need to consider using those definitions now. It all makes sense.

And in following the story line, you get to know that path, and in time, you can travel it with your eyes closed. You won’t want to because it is a thing of sincere beauty. You will want to see everything a long the way. But it is a truly collaborative effort that transcends time itself.

Starting from before then, to right now, then onto wherever we are taken.

Move over Mr. Arnold.

This is the greatest story ever written.

It takes the crown.

As it was intended.

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Was able to elicit a profoundly layered perspective regarding the nature of stymieing personal challenges during a conversation this morning. It was one of those epiphanical moments that sent this stoic noggin a spinning. I am from the vinyl era, so that do make sense.

So when you are enmeshed in multitude personal issues and shortcomings that confound thought, word and deed, for whatever reason, they get tangled up, one in another. Constricting you like a leash or rope, tethering you to poor choices, deceit, ego, control, anger, resentment and strangely enough, isolation and abandonment. One would think that change in some manner or fashion would enable you to break free from this confinement with a steady, forceful pull.

Perhaps.

But if the thoughts, words and deeds remain the same, you will find yourself right back where you were before. Tied to the behaviors that led you to that personal imprisonment in the first place. Only this time, the rope maybe stronger, shorter and more painfully wrapped about your body mind, heart and soul.

Someone next to me referred to the act of unentanglement.

Coming to understand and confront what has you bound, one strand at a time. He cited that even though you may refrain from the action, the habitual self convincing approach to its continuation may yet remain. As such, each of those contrivances utilized to promulgate and perpetuate your current falsehood of a life need to be addressed, understood, cut, and dropped by the side of the road.

Period.

Maybe you can break that rope once or twice. But the fiber of its creation yet remains. Guaranteed to only come back in a stronger, more inhibiting and existence sapping manner.

But, if you break and then eliminate each strand, confinement to that way can no longer exist. Your change in your approach towards life then actually forms its own strands. Acting to extend outward, connecting you to others, healthy pursuits and affirming growth that act together, extending your reach, broadening your horizons and affirming your newly found true self.

Becoming woven into life in this manner means you are enmeshed with others.

True, healthy connection.

Ineinander.

One into the other.

Poor choices, ego, deceit, control, anger and resentment bind one up into isolation and abandonment. Cutting that cord, strand by strand, is freeing. It brings about a deeper understanding and appreciation for what you can become. No longer bound to the past, you can remain fully in the present. Abound in peace and serenity. Connecting to integrity, character, humility, joy and fulfilment.

The bond you now feel is that of respect, support, gratitude, compassion and love. One into the other.

One into living.

As it was intended.