Perhaps this is more a generational thing than it is a basic skill.

It was something I learned to rely upon through out my career and became my go to when I just need to connect with another. Whether on the clock or off.

That “skill”?

Just talking on the phone.

And then?

This one is really scary.

Doing that in person.

A COLD CALL.

I recall when I first started on the road, coins or a credit card number and finding a payphone came into play big time. That was the only way you could advise them you were early, late, needed to reschedule or just plain lost.

If you couldn’t connect? Cold call. Just stop in and talk to the first person you see, Ask them for their help.

Despite the sounds of that, you actually got to know another person that way. Recognizing not only their voice when they picked up, but tone, demeanor and personality. You got the opportunity to get to know the man or woman talking on the phone with you. Even if it went to voicemail, those unwritten rules of engagement assured a call back. Or a chance to at least play tag.

Cold calls are even better.

You get to actually look someone – anyone – in the face and start a conversation. Try your best to put them at ease and open up. Describe the help you seek and who might be best suited to do so. Smile. Crack wise. Just be you.

These days, it literally throws people off if you call. Worse yet? Stop in unannounced.

An email or text merely serves to deflect any true interaction. How ’bout letting Al craft emails because time is so preciously dire or tack on some inane emoji to create the impression of currency and leading edge? Either will make the opportunity for honest and lasting communication ever less likely.

Want to follow up on something?

Try and schedule an appointment?

Need some information?

Ask a pressing question?

Refer someone to another?

Seek some help?

Send it Gmail so you can just wait. Better yet, tap it out on your phone so you can fixate on your palm for the next 24 hours.

Or?

Give them a call.

Hop in the car and just stop by.

Let them get to know you.

Get to know them.

The basics of life.

No skill involved.

I cannot call it a promise.

More of an intention I would have to say. It can be worded all sorts of ways. But what it comes down to for me is just this; stay here.

In this moment.

Now.

Present.

That is not to say I don’t feel the urge to pull off at the next exit when I am heading south for “The Past”. Or the one that comes right after the rest area labeled “Whathasyettobedetermined”. This is an ongoing battle for me. I have put the blinkers on a few times lately. Tapped the brakes. That being said, my sense is that it always will be that way. I just need to work at taking it down a few notches.

Hoping that effort too will remain ongoing.

Staying here is the best way to stick with the now and allow things to happen. One of the most prescient offerings regarding these moments came from Robert Frost. He said “…the best way out is always through.”

Which makes sense. Reverse then cannot come into play and you cannot see or experience anything beyond what is currently in front of you.

It can feel somewhat sunsettling just staying here. For lack of a better term, transitory. Perhaps that is how it is taken. Sensed. Not controlled. Planned. Just there.

But now does only last twenty-four hours, a third of which may be consumed by sleep. Probably explains that growing lack of attachment or concern I have what came before and a general disinterest in devoting or expending any form of energy towards “next” whatsoever.

If I can remain focused, then through can only be seen from where I am right now.

Not simply the best way.

The only way.

Out.

Let’s just say I am not risk adverse.

I am open to trying things, failing, learning and then going back to square one. Not that my risk involves big things like investments, flipping properties, flying a plane, things like that.

But now that I think of it, my dad – “Doc” – learned to how to fly an old Piper with his dad as the copilot, at age 11. I think he had his sights not only set on the horizon but on Guinness as well. My understanding is that someone beat him by a few months.

Then me, my brothers and Charlie from down the block followed Doc’s footsteps and tried it around middle school I will say, by baking the worlds largest cookie. My dad’s dad – a baker – got us connected to a place and we made king size Hollywood Bar. 8′ long x 3′ wide and about 18′ thick. Donated it to a senior center. Didn’t make the Guiness Book but our story showed up in the Chicago Daily News, That clipping is buried in a bin.

Back to risk.

Learned to drive stick in a ten ton dump truck. Operated a jack hammer and paved streets. Played college football just because. Rode in centuries, ran half marathons, worked out daily and flipped a tractor tire up and down a football field at 60.

Renovated a two flat. Helped with a start up manufacturing company, hit the road to sell its services. Left a financially sound company to work for one going through bankruptcy and buying others in the same condition. Dropped my forty some year sales and operations career to coach individuals with diverse abilities.

Wrote. Spoke.

All provided the giddiness I spoke of a post or so ago. And all that can happen is that you goof up and you you cannot pass Go or collect $200.

While those aspects and examples of my love for it continue to move forward, there is another risk I assumed. It is still taking form as it works in reshaping me and my life. I won’t go into detail at this point. I want to. It is just not the time. But let’s just say that there is greater risk to contend with should I abandon this one I recently embraced.

I am not risk adverse.

Especially this version.