Don’t need to carry around that fossil anymore.

What I felt like sharing today: what will I try to do better today than I did yesterday?

Not that I don’t like the prompts. I just felt like talking about this is all.

The past week has been trying to say the least. Some metamorphosis going on me thinks. Figures, it is spring afterall. Allegedly.

I am looking to find some peace of the internal variety. After spending so much of my life over functioning over everything, a dozen or so steps need to be taken backwards. Not so much to start over. More so, to remain in the here and now is all. Some days, I might find myself in a pair of soles from the 70’s or 80’s. Other times, I was in something so far ahead that they hadn’t even made it out the designer’s noggin yet.

That being said, there is a definite need and value to just staying right here. I may get a little agitated by the desire to go futz in the yard or design some screen to keep leaves out the window wells. The former comes as an aside when I got a spare twenty minutes. The latter is still on the drawing board. They are just fulfilling distractions.

But those have never fallen into the “over” category. More so antidotal by nature. So for today, I am going to remain right here. In my thoughts. Definitely in my words. And finally in my actions. I aim to avoid the crisis I can create within the top floor, that spills out of my lips and ends up being made into a mess.

Hallow happens to have a two week journey embracing peace and serenity. And if todays ten minutes is anything like yesterdays, then I am on a pretty dang good path.

So with regard to the actual prompt from today, my aim is to minimalize my over side into extinction.

Don’t need to carry around that fossil anymore.

I just leave it up to discussion

Daily writing prompt
What topics do you like to discuss?

Hmm.

I don’t think I am topic driven. Necessarily.

Me and my youngest son are Godzilla movie fans. We drove 45 minutes away to watch one at midnight once. Both my sons love Lord of the Rings, Star Wars and movies on American history, primarily war flics. All four of them went to see Dead Pool 2 with me. I laughed out loud for the entire show.

I love music – all genres. I have oldies, classical, alt and jazz on Audacy and Spotify for the car. I don’t read nearly enough, but that is changing. I am not a binge watcher of TV, but there are ones I like to watch as regular as possible. Like the Stooges on ME TV for two hours, AFV on Sundays, maybe Nature on PBS, football if the spirit moves me. “The Pitt” has picqued my interest.

Like cooking, inside and on grill, baking the cookie recipe my youngest daughter and I perfected, trying new places out just because, coffee refills and hard boiled eggs from Kwik Trip, Rocky’s Pizza in Westchester, Alexander’s skillets in Stickney and 1505 egg salad sammich with quinoa salad in Mequon.

Gardening is SO much fun. Yard work instant gratification. So is cutting grass. Shoveling snow. Taking a walk around the yard.

I guess what I am trying to share is that I might be able to talk about any topic. Maybe not computer stuff, or investment thingees. I would definitely give it a whirl. I think it is just the honest interaction I desire.

Perhaps there are topics I would really like to engage in. Like my faith and the other changes I have made in my life. But those can get pretty hairy. I can start to go to great lengths when things begin to flow and the noggin is fully engaged. As long as they are willing, I sure am.

Like my grandpa before me, I try not to know any strangers. That is, I start a conversation with just about anyone about anything.

Not that I plan those times. Or know what I will talk about.

I just leave it up to discussion.

For free.

Daily writing prompt
What job would you do for free?

To answer, I would first have to address some verbiage and perspectives I hold that are consistent with this query. This stoic makes everything a job. Bet you didn’t see that coming.

I cannot say for certain that my mind goes to “job” when it comes to work or employment. Maybe it’s the connotation that steers me in another direction. A ‘”job” is what you have to do. Something more severe than an assignment. The harsh side of obligation. Being spent in an arduous, boring transaction that only renders cash.

“….a regular, contracted activity or piece of work performed in exchange for payment, serving as an individual’s role, task, or position of employment. It is the specific, often repetitive, set of responsibilities and duties an person holds, distinct from a broader career or profession.”

I don’t look at things that way. Like “I have to go to work”, or “I have to find another job”, You get to do a lot of things in life, and this is just another part of living it. I have been fortunate to have remained engaged in employment my entire life. In some situations, those around me asserted I was not making enough, was worth more, and was working for free.

The self worth aspects of that are being addressed as we speak.

But when the work engaged me in areas other than my wallet, I think I thrived in that environment. It was never a job at that point. It was fulfilling, affirming and necessary. So in that regard, I probably did work for free, or some modicum of charity.

Cannot recall the year, but I used to push my parents lawnmower and gas can around the neighborhood and cut lawns. Learned how to paint houses. Then pumped gas, learned how to check oil, then change oil and fill tires. Unloaded trucks and loaded butcher tables at a meat processing business.

Cleaned hospitals.

Learned to drive stick in a 10 ton dump truck to pick up gravel and ashphalt to patch streets and curbs in my hometown.

Sold appliances. Then into the business world of manufacturing and distribution. Now job development and coaching for those with diverse abilities. Looking into some other areas for engagement and enrichment. Hospice care? Maybe more writing. Who knows.

Everyone of these “jobs” had elements of charity in them. Where I did things off the clock. For free. It is just how I have always rolled. Now? I am never really off the clock. But as long as I can give something back, that is compensation enough. It may not swell the check book. But sure does so for the heart and soul.

So very, very long story short, in my stoic noggin, I have really never had a job. I just like to give my time, talents and treasures in a variety of manners, wherever, to just live my life. No rhyme or reason really. Sort of off the cuff. Never went to college to be anything other than an athlete. The degree just came along with the arthritis.

Has always been make it up as I go.

Things may have been tense and rocky at times. But it all worked out. And will continue to do so. That brings with it a great sense of freedom and serenity. If there happens to be a paycheck involved, then so be it.

But until then, I will keep working as I always have.

For free.

My wish.

Daily writing prompt
What do you wish you could do more every day?

I cannot honestly list anything that may fall into this category.

I am looking for volunteer opportunities to fill in gaps each week. One is already under way. Another will get closer next week. And still one more requires some on line and in person training. So that will be the last in the quiver for now.

This part of my life is truly a source of great joy and I look for ways to fit more of it into each twenty four hours. I love being able to share with all of you. A connection I never thought would be found and embraced. We are just getting to know one another, but there is no rush in that.

More involvement with my kids and grandkids is also an ongoing venture. Lunch with #2 this afternoon. Have a cute spring outfit to drop off for #3’s new daughter. She is growing like a weed. So I hope it will still fit.

It is somewhat ironic that today’s was “what do you wish you could do more every day.”

Ironic in the sense that I have been been engaging in some ongoing reflection about life in general. An integral aspect of my personal reclamation project. Combine it with the genuine discernment that accompanies the Lenten season, and this Jurassic vintage gray matter is firing away nonstop. Well, somewhat.

Reflection of late is not so much dwelling on or in things, as was common practice before, nor does it have anything to do with looking out over the skis for what is to come. It is more about finding the serenity in true honesty with oneself. Dispensing with the camo provided by the joint forces of ego and pride to see for once, and oddly enough, appreciate things for what they were. Let me tell you; truly an f’d up existence masquerading as some facade. Not sure pun to create for that yet. But when I do, you will be the first to know that pun.

Weird thing is, in no way do I wish to change any of it. Because somehow, it miraculously brought be to where I am today. I know how that happened and how it will remain and continue as such ad infinitum. The past had to happen the way it did so I could experience the present the way it is.

So to answer the prompt in a nut shell; live just like this.

For as long as I can.

My wish.

And so it will be written.

Daily writing prompt
If there were a biography about you, what would the title be?

Boy, this really made me think.

Someone would actually commit themselves to writing my life story. I haven’t been as committed as I should to writing my own. And someone wants that chore? Yikes.

I don’t know how you would combine comedy/horror/drama into one word. Comorrama?

To be honest, Folgers made things percolate a little and brewed up a couple of ideas.

“W.I.P.” That pretty much sets the tone.

Or maybe “Unfinished.”

“What were you thinking?” And should they have the wherewithal to write a sequel, “Or not.”

First, being considered as a potential subject for a biography is tough to grasp. I spent much of my life setting myself apart from others in self destructive manners. That being said, I am not really keen on having that bound between two hard covers so that I can stand out, alone, on some shelf. Had enough of solitary confinement, thank you.

I get that sharing trials and tribulations via the written word may help others to finally see theirs too. But those words cannot just sit, they need to find their way out. I already work on that by other means and ways. Publication is not needed for that venture. Just being fully in the moment with others is.

And what tends to come out when I do this is what should be seen in others. Not because I say so, but simply because it is, and for some reason, it just gets overlooked. That one I have practiced to perfection. Not knowing what it is I have, can be or to the point – am. So I am not sure how that is translated biographically.

I guess that is what first started as motivational tomes for student-athletes has morphed into mostly just insights into the things I finally sense, see and hear. You can start out one way, but if you are open to change, growth and actually living, then good things happen. What you were meant to be comes into view, and that is simply where you want to go.

So a hundred or so words later, still no clue what a biography about me might be called. If I were allowed to bend the rules a smidge, I could go the autobiographical route. Then, “…my temporary assignment” works just fine.

And so it will be written.