Joy

With an open heart and mind, plus a  little effort, there is much joy to be found all around you.And for some reason you may have to learn how to find it.  Gain a sense of what it looks like. Sounds like.  Feels like. 

It is beyond fun.  

I  am telling you it lasts way longer than just plain old fun.  

Way longer. 

Mostly because it is like this living, breathing being. Your  partner in  all the things you do, the efforts you make and the commitments you honor.

Now this  may sound dumb, but it can be found in some of the oddest places.  

Like at a practice.  

Working after class with your calc teacher to understand differential equations.  

Struggling to master an adagio.  

Tutoring a youngster to speak English. 

Little things that bring more than just fun.

Something far deeper than happiness. 

So let me ask you this:  

You ever really listen to what it sounds like when you are having a great practice?  

Capture that sensation when you solve a linear partial differential equation on your own? 

Feel the deliberate, meandering nature of a well executed adagio ? 

Or share in the sense of wonderment that comes with reading your first sentence?  

Little things that may not seem like all that much.  

Instants that can dissipate before you know it.  

But moments you can return to over and over and over again. 

As often as you like. 

Once you have been there.  

And know what they look, sound and feel like.  

That living, breathing being. 

Partner in  all the things you do.  The efforts you make. 

And the commitments you honor.

Joy.

(Came across this one from 2015.)

PF

One of the most influential mentors in my life is Pastor Ellsworth Freyer. “PF” to those close to him.  “Coach” to me.  I was blessed to be  one of many he coached throughout his life as a man of the cloth.  He coached me to coach.  To mentor. Serve others.  And write. 

When I would run into writer’s block penning some words of encouragement to those I served, he would reach out and share some of his words of wisdom.  The most inspiring were found in his motivational pieces, he called “Power Thoughts”.  Aptly named.  I happened upon this one tonight (in 2017):   

“One of the most sobering thoughts I have ever been confronted with  is this: ‘What you are someday going to be, you are now becoming.’ 

Right at this very moment in time, you are exactly what you have been in the process of becoming – all your life. 

So?  Are you the person you dreamed of becoming? 

How close are you to becoming the type of person you want to be? 

Even right now, you are in the process of becoming the person you will be in an hour.  In a day. Next month.  The coming year. In two, five or in a decade.  

And the habits?  Those  you have now – and will begin to acquire and accumulate – determine the person you will eventually, someday, become. 

If you are not now doing the things that you need to do, to become what you want to be, what makes you believe that you ever will? 

What is preventing you from becoming that person? The one you want to become? 

It is incumbent upon you to choose to begin now. 

Situations or circumstances should never determine the when, if or how you begin. 

So? 

Just begin.  And begin right now. 

For what you are now becoming, is what you will someday be.”

Next one.

“One of the illusions of life is that the present hour is not the critical decisive hour. Write it on your heart that every day is the best day of the year. He only is right who owns the day, and no one owns the day who allows it to be invaded by worry, fret and anxiety. Finish every day, and be done with it. You have done what you could.”

 Ralph Waldo Emerson 

To write it on your heart is a pledge. To take an oath. To commit. And once committed, to own it. So let me ask you: “Where is the sense in holding in, holding on or holding out?” There can never be an inkling of thought granted to waiting for the “right moment”. For once you do, it is a lock that it will have already passed. 

Fretting over what might have been or might be is a waste of energy, effort and time. It takes you out of where you are now: today. Consigning your thoughts, words and deeds to “enduring” the so-called “fates” or embracing “conventional wisdom” can only lead you astray. Right down a path where things will undoubtedly happen to you. When in fact, you should always be the one happening to things. 

Give some serious consideration to what Mr. Emerson proposes. Every day can be the best day of the year. And if you do live it right – they should be. One right after the other. 

So write it on your heart. 

Bind yourself to that oath to own each and every one of them. Pledge your sacred honor to make this day the best.

But just until the next one.

Practice

The competitive nature of athletics is said to develop character.

And, it is thought that adversity’s task is to reveal it.

Perhaps.

But maybe character isn’t so much in need of development or of being revealed. Though its expectations remain high, it could be that character’s demands are much simpler to grasp.

Maybe character is just desperate to be spoken. And then, heard.

To be trusted and afforded the benefit of the doubt.

That stands to reason. Since character always knows the right thing to do and just when to do it.

And as you begin to listen, then hear, you will find yourself drawn closer towards it. Finding comfort in its embrace, a sense of purpose in its guidance and a growing courage to use it to face everything life can throw your way.

Character simply yearns to be the first, the best and the last choice you would ever make.  And learning to act upon its “recommendation” puts you on a trajectory aimed directly toward your best interests.

Let’s look at it this way.

To effect tangible, positive and lasting influence on anything you choose to master, only one thing is known to work.

Practice.

If it is engineering, medicine or teaching that has captured your heart, then you put your desires to practice.

The cello? Singing arias, painting with watercolors, architecture, cooking or film?  Mastery is not gained in one attempt.  But in many.

It takes practice.

Is it service that calls you?

Then finding the pathway – both within and without –  that will lead you there takes effort, commitment.

And, practice.

For some, athletic competition is what makes the spirit soar.  To become all you intend to be, you have to employ all that you are to honor that purpose.

Through  practice.

So to be able to hear, trust and embrace character’s voice?

It takes practice.

By developing good listening habits. Getting attuned to its singular voice. Hearing its message.

Having faith in its command and making a commitment to heeding its wisdom. Learning to allow it to be your unshakable guide and loyal mentor. And developing  the patience to allow it to do its work.

Over, and over, and over, and over again.

Putting character into practice.

“…conscious will…”

Character is more than what or how you are, or even how you are being defined by others. 

It is more about how you go about defining yourself. 

By the choices you have made, are making now and will make sometime tomorrow. Like the ones made when blessed with abundant  success.  Those seemingly throw away ones made during those long stretches of “the same old same old.” And the ones made when faced with adversity. 

Character isn’t an amenity. 

Or an accessory. 

Something to be stowed away. Reserved for a special occasion, or on display when the time is right and the audience ample.   

Character is intentional. An active endeavor. To be fully employed and engaged.   Just as you are meant to pursue all other things of value. Now. At this moment.   

Character in action is a brand of leadership borne from within. 

“ The first act of leadership is coming to grips with yourself, who you are, where you are, and what is of value to you, and shaping yourself by acts of conscious will into what you want to become” * 

Intention. 

Breathing life into the aggregate of those traits and qualities.   Casting your impression on what is of value. Shaping yourself into what are meant to become by making a difference. 

Now. 

Character – fully employed, engaged and in action – honors the best that is within all. Character creates pull. Attraction. Its own gravity, drawing others into your orbit. The genesis of an intensely personal brand of leadership meant to take this moment. 

This I know to be true. 

  • Fenwick W. English