“…conscious will…”

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Character is more than what or how you are, or even how you are being defined by others. 

It is more about how you go about defining yourself. 

By the choices you have made, are making now and will make sometime tomorrow. Like the ones made when blessed with abundant  success.  Those seemingly throw away ones made during those long stretches of “the same old same old.” And the ones made when faced with adversity. 

Character isn’t an amenity. 

Or an accessory. 

Something to be stowed away. Reserved for a special occasion, or on display when the time is right and the audience ample.   

Character is intentional. An active endeavor. To be fully employed and engaged.   Just as you are meant to pursue all other things of value. Now. At this moment.   

Character in action is a brand of leadership borne from within. 

“ The first act of leadership is coming to grips with yourself, who you are, where you are, and what is of value to you, and shaping yourself by acts of conscious will into what you want to become” * 

Intention. 

Breathing life into the aggregate of those traits and qualities.   Casting your impression on what is of value. Shaping yourself into what are meant to become by making a difference. 

Now. 

Character – fully employed, engaged and in action – honors the best that is within all. Character creates pull. Attraction. Its own gravity, drawing others into your orbit. The genesis of an intensely personal brand of leadership meant to take this moment. 

This I know to be true. 

  • Fenwick W. English

G=R

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Ralph Marston Jr., an inspirational author once said; “Your goals, minus your doubts, equals your reality.”

If you want, you could take this concept, reduce it even further, and transform it into some simple arithmetic. 

G – D = R

With some effort, a personal commitment and a positive attitude, you can solve for “R”.  And being that you are the one to control the factors, you are also the one that can make the difference.  

A dream is a blueprint. 

A fully illustrated and dimensionalized  rendering of your goals. Creating an image that is so vivid, that you can actually live in it, each step along the way.  

Until you make it your reality.    

That image of what you want to do, where you want to go, and what you want to be, becomes the focal point of everything you do along the way to get there. Then all you need to do is make what is going on out here  match with what you see in your head and what you feel in your heart. 

It requires an extraordinary level of vision to be able to “see” that  goal.

Because you can never afford to lose sight of the present; the moment you are in right now.  This is where all the prep work takes place. Discipline learned.  Commitments made.   Attitudes formed. Character revealed.

Yet you also need to develop the skills to check the horizon, to establish your coordinates and to adjust your long term plans if need be.

If it appears that your destination – the goal – is getting closer, then perhaps your work in the present is paying off. You are making progress, you are affecting your reality. 

And once you get to that point, when you get there, it will be like deja vu all over again. You will have already spent months or years in that moment, in that very place Only this time, you get to actually do it.

However, if you look up and find the horizon seems farther away than when you last looked, or is missing altogether, perhaps it is time to regroup.

It can be at this juncture where doubt can make its presence known.  Excuses, rationalization and self pity will begin to take their toll.  A negative attitude can add to the inertia, increasing drag, acting as an anchor.

Self doubt can begin to slowly destroy your spirit, overshadow your confidence, bury your talent, and push you to simply quit.  The voice within you that always said. “I know I can” grows silent.

Self doubt is a choice, and if you allow it to take root it can diminish the value of your goal substantially.  Allow it to grow and get out of control, self doubt will ultimately erase your goal in its entirety, leaving in its wake, a reality marked by unrealized potential, disappointment and pain.

Your choices wield the power to ignore self doubt’s distractions and  eliminate them altogether.

You can choose to refuse doubt.

With vision, a positive attitude, and the ‘want to’ to eliminate self doubt, the equation for success is simpler yet: goals equal reality.

Or:        

G=R

Saints

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“Something I shared with all back in 2017. Came across it tonight and thought it good to share again. This made me misty eyed, but he still makes me smile. “

To set the tone for this day and his homily this evening, Father Matthew sought to describe the essence of a saint. Part of which resonated with this author.

“Someone that does what they do, the way that they do it”.

Rick Hader left this world today.

All too soon. And the hurt is palpable. But it is All-Saints Day. He has a chance to play to a much larger crowd, in a storied venue. Doing what he does. The way he does it.

I had the honor of blocking for him in college as a Siwash. He was All-Conference as a running back, and All-American as a role model, man and friend if you ask me. (Rick is #44)

He was just as gifted running between the tackles and catching the ball coming out of the backfield as he was cracking us up. The voices, faces, mannerisms and making his teeth squeaky clean with only an index finger were recurring bits in the dorm, on campus and in the huddle.

He found great joy in making us smile, laugh and forget about things for only a little while.

Now, 37 years later and aided by some hindsight, I now realize he was building his schtick there at Knox College. And creating his persona.

For Myron Noodleman was right there with us all along. But it was just Rick.  Doing what he did. The way he did it.

I would encourage you to take a few moments and read about this national nerd.

It details a wonderful life’s journey from Park Ridge to Broken Arrow. Starting as a janitor, to being a beloved high school math teacher and becoming a diamond doofus.

An All-American role model, man and friend to many that found great joy in making thousands upon thousands of people smile, laugh and forget about things for a while.

Go deeper, between the lines and you will come to know them  both as I. A match now made for heaven. A pair with the guts to listen, heed their calling and fearlessly follow it. And from what I understand, all the way to the end.

Your departure has left a big hole in the lives of many. But there are warm and lasting memories enough to fill it back in, bring a smile to the face, some laughter for the heart and offer many a respite from things for a while.

Just Rick and Myron doing what they did. The way they did it.

Saints if you ask me.

Expect it.

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ex·pec·ta·tion  noun \ˌek-ˌspek-ˈtā-shən, ik-\  : a belief that something will happen or is likely to happen

In certain respects, expectation is something beyond just simple belief that something may, is likely to or will happen.

To expect is to muster the forces – mental, physical, emotional and spiritual – necessary to produce a desired reality.  To expect is an intention.  To direct ourselves with purpose intentionally.   To do, to be – and –  to give our best.   

The expectations we have and have set firm for ourselves – in the form of personal standards – represent intention.  

A method  of directing ourselves with a higher purpose towards all that we choose to be, where we choose to go and who we choose to become.  In raising the bar high for ourselves, we are setting the tone that can carry us through life. Living our life with expectation can create an abundant supply of opportunity.  An achievement rich environment where both present and even future circumstances will favor us, and in time, even bending to our will.    

Having high expectations and personal standards  affirms and reflects our true self and character. It displays our commitment to always and without hesitation “do” and “be” our absolute best.  

In time, as we “do” and “be” our best, we will gain confidence and develop a sense of growing mastery.  We will no longer feel the need to be so focused inward, but rather detect  a tug to look outward. Beyond ourselves. And, to share.  Then, we will be in a position to make a very intentional,  personal statement with the utmost certainty.  

To always “give” our best. 

For in one sense, to “do” and to “be” our best represents only a beginning.  Learning  to “give” our best acts to connect us to some very powerful, lasting and positive thoughts in an entirely different realm of deeds. To be able to develop beyond a  “do our best” mode of living and grow into a “give our best” way of being, we are raising that  bar of expectation again, once more.  

Establishing for ourselves a brand new standard. An expectation born of personal growth. One of sacrifice.  A declaration that our original commitment to “do”  and “be” has now become one of “to give”. That we will make the best of “what” and “who” we are readily available to all others.  Anyone and everyone.  No strings attached.  Whenever,  wherever, however.  And therein lies the opportunity.  

Giving the best of “what” and “who” we are shows others how much they are valued.  Confirming  to them how important their achievement and success is to each one of us.  It shows them just how much they are  loved.  Telling  them in no uncertain terms that “you deserve the absolute best of me“. 

Giving our best to others isn’t about economics, transactions or a “quid pro quo”.  Giving others your best is never about an expectation of getting anything in return. Giving your best to others is what you are made for.  It is the right thing to do,  for their sake and ultimately yours as well.

By giving your best, you are “coaching up” others to aspire to always do their best.  In the process, you live and breathe that mindset of high expectation and standards. You gain a level of comfort operating within a personal universe marked by high expectations, a dedication to striving for optimal performance and pursuing excellence. 

By giving our best, we allow others to share that same achievement-rich environment where both present and future circumstances will conspire to favor all, bending to our collective will.   

Don’t merely believe that something may or will happen.  

Expect it.

You.

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“What we can or cannot do, what we consider possible or impossible, is rarely a function of our true capability. It is more likely a function of our beliefs about who we are.”

  • Tony Robbins

Pushing beyond your known boundaries and limitations will never be an easy proposition.  It takes courage, a high level of resiliency, grit and the utmost in genuine humility.  

Just as you are  getting to only the outer fringes of your abilities, you could encounter failure on the grandest scale.  Venturing out there, simply to see if you can do it could be a souring experience and leave you questioning everything you thought you knew about yourself.  

Talk about an opportunity for some honest self-assessment.

But as you respond,  persevere, move forward, and advance even in the smallest of increments, you are well into the process of finding out who you really are.  You will begin to recognize just what you can do. 

How truly powerful you are. 

Who you are. 

And despite the disappointment, anxiety, and distress that needs to be overcome first and along the way, you will come to recognize  that person was there all along.  

Just waiting.  

Waiting to be found. 

You.