Tag: discipline

Or as part of the family.

“Family” is bandied about in various aspects and venues of life. It is especially conveyed as an corporate aspiration throughout the business world, as a way to promote community at schools of all levels and is especially prevalent in sports teams, just to name a few.

One thing I have noticed is that often times when the term is used, perhaps innocently and honestly at first glance, it seems that the key focal point of family is muddled. The table – that one common place you are called around to gather, collaborate, bond and love – can take on somewhat of a preset configuration. Maybe initially born of shape, but moreso how it tends to become organized and prioritized.

Whether by happenstance or design, it seems to gravitate towards being large and rectangular. Yet regardless of the origin, the configuration provides the “correct” setting for those that deem themselves apart. Those most worthy may elect to reign at the head of the table. Then, others so inclined, may array themselves strategically around the head, as second, third, fourth and so in, “in command”, honor, prestige or standing.

Things can get away from you if you lose sight of the true goal, becoming more an organizational, ruling setting than family in my estimation.

Throughout my time in football, I have noticed that the team huddle can too somehow begin to take on that shape, with certain players assuming a spot at the head – through their chosen thoughts, words and deeds. If not careful and grounded in the truth of the moment, ego and class become weapons to run roughshod over others. This creates separation not unity. And when those elders team up on the bully pulpit, others in that much larger family begin to shrink, retreat and hide away. What is meant to be an all inclusive, tightly woven circle morphs into some other obtuse geometry of disarray.

Not the way to be family.

With a truly familial mindset, shape neither creates nor reinforces misplaced values. What matters most is why you are being called, how it can become a lasting, loving and positive impact on all those gathered around it and what you can ultimately do and become to honor that family.

Perhaps it is a large rectangle because it merely fits the space available and the numbers enjoined. The huddle it meant to retain a shape conducive to shoulder to shoulder, arms entwined and eyes locked in common bond and purpose. Come to the think of it, despite it being a large “U”, the triclinium overcame its own challenges of shape and guest to bring together and create the most compelling family of all time.

You can choose to be defined by the shape of the space.

Or as part of the family.

Confluence

“As a single footstep will not make a path on the earth, so a single thought will not make a pathway in the mind. To make a deep physical path, we walk again and again. To make a deep mental path, we must think over and over the kind of thoughts we wish to dominate our lives.”

– Henry David Thoreau 

Maybe you have noticed a transformation. 

Perhaps you are gaining a sense of this. 

Feeling its tug. An awareness of gravity.  How the mass of  your collective thoughts, words and deeds have led you to this instant. 

Impacting someone.  Making something.  Leading somewhere.

For they all matter.  And even now, both they – and you – are still being shaped.  

Taking all that you have been up to now – and making you into what you are to become. The embodiment of all that is the best in you; character, excellence, perseverance and leadership.  

Your intentions then finally and irrevocably become reality.  

A convergence of age, ability, experience. The confluence of discipline, desire and dreams. In something altogether new.  That will stand  alone. That will never happen precisely in this fashion ever again. 

Long ago, each of you entertained the smallest germ of a thought.  A glimmer of a dream. 

At that moment, you decided.  You chose a destination. 

But a  path was needed.  Direction determined.  A pace to be set.   

You let go.  Abandoned yourself for one another.  Subservient for a greater good.  Exerting the will to expend yourself in all aspects of your being. Succumbing to a level of  self-discipline that ultimately created this extraordinary circumstance. 

Creating a singular vision, originating from a common perspective.

“The soul attracts that which it secretly harbours; that which it loves; it reaches the height of its cherished aspirations; … and circumstances are the means by which the soul receives its own.”   – James Allen

What your souls  harbor is especially important right now.  For as I speak, what  you have always wanted is right there. In your path. Within reach.  

The allure of what lay just ahead may be tempting.  You might want to peek. To veer left a little.  Or to the right.  To get up on tippy toes to take a gander. To peer over the top. 

Yet,  you must not stray.

To look ahead is to leave this moment.  Lifting one’s gaze up,  around or under will skew your  trajectory.  A change in perspective will reduce focus.  Obfuscate vision. Dissipate intention.  Impede effort. Foster missteps.  

You could lose sight of your path. 

Distractions are apt to be abundant. Self induced.  Born of doubt. Fear. Expectation. Anticipation.  Yet focus is not meant to exist in the absence of distractions. It is a trait intended to exist in spite of them. 

So just as you chose this path, you must now decide to maintain focus. 

To honor your  vision regardless of the situation. Committing to preserve that most singular and proper perspective.   To abide by the very essence of discipline.  Expending  unparalleled levels of effort and persistence. Exerting uncommon character and leadership.  Aspiring to the highest standards of attitude and attention. 

To finish.  

To relentlessly pursue  excellence. 

And succeed.   

By setting a tone that rings true to your vision alone.  

Converging on your path.  

So that you all flow together at one point.

In this stand alone  moment. 

Practice

“Again, another share of a post from years ago, promoting the value of practice. Not just on the field, weight room, office, board room, home, community. But every where. Always and in all ways:”

The competitive nature of athletics is said to develop character.

And, it is thought that adversity’s task is to reveal it.

Perhaps.

But maybe character isn’t so much in need of development or of being revealed. Though its expectations remain high, it could be that character’s demands are much simpler to grasp.

Maybe character is just desperate to be spoken. And then, heard.

To be trusted and afforded the benefit of the doubt.

That stands to reason. Since character always knows the right thing to do and just when to do it.

And as you begin to listen, then hear, you will find yourself drawn closer towards it. Finding comfort in its embrace, a sense of purpose in its guidance and a growing courage to use it to face everything life can throw your way.

Character simply yearns to be the first, the best and the last choice you would ever make.  And learning to act upon its “recommendation” puts you on a trajectory aimed directly toward your best interests.

Let’s look at it this way.

To effect tangible, positive and lasting influence on anything you choose to master, only one thing is known to work.

Practice.

If it is engineering, medicine or teaching that has captured your heart, then you put your desires to practice.

The cello? Singing arias, painting with watercolors, architecture, cooking or film?  Mastery is not gained in one attempt.  But in many.

It takes practice.

Is it service that calls you?

Then finding the pathway – both within and without –  that will lead you there takes effort, commitment.

And, practice.

For some, athletic competition is what makes the spirit soar.  To become all you intend to be, you have to employ all that you are to honor that purpose.

Through  practice.

So to be able to hear, trust and embrace character’s voice?

It takes practice.

By developing good listening habits.

Getting attuned to its singular voice.

Hearing its message.

Having faith in its command and making a commitment to heeding its wisdom.

Learning to allow it to be your unshakable guide and loyal mentor.

And developing  the patience to allow it to do its work.

Over, and over, and over, and over again.

Putting character into practice.