Tag: forgiveness

“I love you”

Daily writing prompt
If you had a freeway billboard, what would it say?
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Once I embarked on my journey towards faith, two things were revealed. One, that the story would remain a constant, following a path that shared the seasons. This brings with it a sense of peace and serenity, knowing the way. But more stunning to me is the fact that along each step of the way, I become aware of something new, different and touching.

Perhaps it is how the story is told, through a multitude of voices, perspectives and experiences that provides greater impact and deeper meaning. Add to that the fact that the moments and revelations shared were not of this century, the prior, or even millenia. They were uttered or written long, long ago, spoken in to others with ancient tongues and dialects, detailed with reed and papyrus. And yet, at this instant, they maintain a revelance and power far beyond anything today.

Just over the past few days, John speaks of the difference of being one of the world and being one of God. How our infirmities and debilitation is fostered, raised and enhanced by things all around us. Being caught up in these concerns, like resentment, ego and self-righteousness, takes one down a ruinous path, speaking from my own experience. But upon letting go of things born of the world around you, an altogher different life takes hold. In a comforting, sustaining and altogher safe way.

His only son was sent here to teach all of us how to live and to love. When you feel as though there is nothing left for you, that you are worthless, unvalued and ruined, you can leave this world behind. Not in a hopeless manner. But in a hope-full approach. So as to truly be what you were made for, with true intention, trust and the knowledge that you are loved steadfastly and singularly.

We may be on the earth for now, but by no means does this require us to be of this world. We have the free will to choose.

And finally, to just live.

So if I had a billboard?

How about this:

“I love you”

Have a wonder-full ’26!!!

Daily writing prompt
What makes you feel nostalgic?
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When I come across these assignments, I tend to look up the origin of words. Just because. I think it is part of my creative process. A venture that has grown to its own level of prominence of late. To learn where it came from, how it was first used and what it became over time connects myriad dots and thoughts. My ever evolving creative process.

So on my way to that, I see that it rhymes with “myalgia”. Pain in one or more muscles. May sound odd, but some of the memories that arrive under the guise of nostalgia, are evident in the pain that seems to remain to this day. Not so much about regret. More so a feel good variety, that takes one back to some stellar moments.

Delving ever deeper, nostalgia was born of the Greek word, “nostos” meaning to return home, and, “algos”, or pain. Returning home to pain. I guess that is one way to look at it. But in this instance, not what this is going to be about. But I digress….

“Nostalgic” can be taken from a half full or half empty perepective. Similar to “reolution” this time of year. Wait, this time last year, because those would have been completed by now. Right? Right. But for what ever reason, my sense is that nostalgia seems focused on what has passed and is now gone, just like resolution is tied to what is not yet to be yet expected to take place all the same. Neither of which seem to have any connection to the present. A sad state of affairs.

If I look back on those nostalgic moments, yes, I can relive the joy that I felt at the time, being a part of our connected to an event or a time that has become a part of my very being. And yet, what is to say that those instances cannot be recreated and re-expereinced again? And again? And then, again? There is nothing that states they are reserved for that one hour, on that day, in that year, when Jupiter was in collusion with Saturn and Io was being shy and hiding because Orion had him in his sights. What was it about those times that can be remade now so that you no longer return home to pain, but recreate the sustaining sustenance of pure joy?

Maybe that is where resolve becomes part of the equation. Not the noun, the end game when we celebrate almost making it happen in ’26 but “honestly” adding it to the to do/bucket list of ’27. But the verb, to act in a committed and intentional manner so as to make the most of each and every moment from this point forward. Just imagine the nostalgia that can be made and added to the collection. Not just to be kept packed away with the LP’s, 8-tracks, cassettes and CD’s in the basement storage area. But literally moments that can captured daily on bluetooth. Played everywhere and at anytime.

So yes, I feel nostalgic about some of the times in my life. I talk to my small circle of friends, not often enough. I spark accomplishment and achievement in others, then witness their joy when the planets and constellations align. Connecting the dots between similar moments in my existence and theirs. Recreating them so to speak, re-experiencing the joy of those wonderful and wonder-full moments.

So let’s just say this. It can be a return home to something other than pain. But only if you resolve to stay right where you are and live as you were meant. Nothing but peace, serenity and true joy resides there.

Have a wonder-full ’26!!!

But I digress…

A very compelling question to begin the day.

There are a number of those that have cast an impression upon me, in their way, ultimately soliciting a positive outcome in my life. Some are instantaneous in nature, sort of a spontaneous combustion event. While there are those that were merely planted, left and took months, years or decades to germinate and come to fruition.

Moments, interactions and relationships can assume an identity all their own, playing out a role that may not be readily apparent. There are those that bring with them an open and genuine level of honesty and positivity. Meant for one’s immediate care and benefit. Delivered with complete integrity, humility and a love born of servanthood to all those in need.

The impact of those interactions are immediately apparent. And I can name many that were there in that fashion, precisely when I desperately needed it.

One in particular was so in tune with my wellbeing, that he somehow called me, out of the blue, precisely during one of my worst moments, simply because he wanted me to know that he was there for me. No matter what. To this day, I remain touched by this level of loving care. The fact that I just shared this event with all of you brings tears to my eyes, despite the fact it happened well over a decade ago.

Then, there are those lessons one encounters that begin more with a somewhat arbitrary sense of conviction and desire, because its “how I did it and it works, so you should do it too.” Born more of convention or convenience. Just because. And depending on the current circumstances in one’s life, one might be more apt to surrender a bit oneself to become like them. Join the clique. Be a member of the “team”.

At first, things may reap the rewards yearned for, creating a false sense of “I made it.” But as the cost to your true being is accounted for, things slip away and you can descend into realms that taint, harm and destroy. There might be ways to assuage this sense of loss and losing recognition of who it is you were to start. But ultimately, it becomes a lesson of redemption and rebirth. An interaction that cast a cloud of negativity over you and your life. But ultimately, in the final analysis, led you to where you were meant to be.

Just as I am indebted to those who have touched my soul in ways I never imagined, I too am grateful that others have led me to tough lessons in self realization and affirmation. Perhaps they were never intended to be how I accepted them. But despite the negative origins, they too became a positive and lasting influence on me. And to those men, I am also grateful for being a part of my journey.

I tend to digress once pen is in hand. But with regard to the basis of the prompt, “describe a man who has positively impacted your life”, without a doubt, he would be Him. God.

It was He that suggested that many fellow coach should call precisely when I needed to hear his voice and feel his love. And it was He that allowed me to exercise my free will, albeit poor in execution, while remaining right next to me as I rebuilt and found my true way forward in life. He brought all those other men in and out of my life, when they were needed, then not, so that I could finally find this man.

The one sharing this prompt on one of the best days ever.

According to His plan.

But I digress…

Back to a nakedness as it were.

As I progress through my self reclamation project, I find that in more ways than one, I am becoming more attuned to God. The readings, gospel, reflections and the homily inspire me to discover, read, reflect and open myself to ever more to centering Him in my life. Revelation upon revelation.

At football today, I had the opportunity to share the lectern with a fellow coach, for “Faith and Football.” Reading Matthew 23, and then some thoughts on our perspective to the team, we hoped to create an awareness of ego and pride within them and how it can work against them, isolating all from each other and obstructing development, growth and the auspices of a true team.

“Incurvatus in se” and “excurvatus ex se”, the definitive approach I came across last week was a central part of our segment today. They offer a compelling avenue towards understanding the ill effects of ego and a pride run rampant, for all involved. And as I went deeper into these aspects of faith, they provided the key towards a better grasp of sin.

Words can become so convoluted and misrepresented. Convoluted not so much in terms of complicated and difficult to understand, but moreso akin to the technical view of the word;”intricately folded, twisted, or coiled.” Misrepresented, to “give a false or misleading account of the nature of.”, so that an audience can be led to or away from some desired end point. By the looks of it, sin falls into that convoluted, misrepresented category.

Now at this point of this collection of words and punctuation, this is just me thinking out loud. Well, typing/blogging out loud. So here goes:

My initial understanding of it – sin – was the acts committed. And that original sin was our affliction at birth. Immoral, wrong, hurtful things we choose to do, perhaps predicated from a mindset possessed the day we were born. Simplistic in my estimation. Generic. Overly. Not to mention that it leaves one kinda hangin’.

Reading more about and peering into the Garden, a deeper sense of awareness and connection is more evident. They two were formed of the earth and breathed into life by Him, granted both freewill and the experience offered by the world about them. Anything the heart could desire could be found in the trees that surrounded and sheltered them. All was theirs to experience, save one. The fruit of the tree of knowledge.

As Bishop Barron explains it; “So how about the prohibition? We hear that
they are prohibited from eating from one tree, which
is a “tree of knowledge of good and evil.” What does
that mean? God is the unconditioned good. Therefore,
God is, in his own being, the criterion of good and evil.
Therefore, the prerogative belongs to God alone to
know good and evil. The original sin is arrogating to
ourselves the prerogative of determining good and evil,
when our wills become the criterion and the measure
rather than God.”

Pretty much depicts the nature of the serpent that has been ever present in my life; ego.

Professing to know it all and be everything to everybody as espoused from the pulpit of my creation – ego and pride. And as Adam and Eve found shelter from themselves and protection from the truth by donning clothes, that only serves to cave oneself in around oneself. “Incurvatus in se”.

Arrogating spells out to a “T” the aim of the ego and false pride. It cannot but help reduce oneself into a being of false servitude.

The daily revelations that He shares with me, have opened a heart and mind that have remain closed for quite some time. In many ways a form of solitary confinement.

Exerting the gift of freewill and choosing His path is remaking things for me in this stage in life. The apeture is growing , the curve opening outward more towards Him and others.

BRUEGHEL, Jan El Viejo_El Jardín del Edén, c.1610-1612 _(CTB.1988.29)

Back to a nakedness as it were.