Tag: life

The Pail.

“Towards the end of my tenure in youth football, I bought a pail, gathered some dirt and shared with the kids the idea of “rubbing some dirt on it”. A way to get past the aches and pains in all forms that accompany football and life.

The pail was set on the practice field and by the bench at each game for whomever needed or wanted some.

Seems like we can all use some dirt at some time in our life.

Below is my post to them: “

You might have noticed a pail sitting by my bags and equipment boxes today.

In that pail, lay some of the most fertile soil around. Dark, rich, 100% Lemke Park dirt. At one time, it could have been home to corn, wheat  or soybeans.  Perhaps even hay. 

But now, it grows the best piece of grass in all of Mequon-Thiensville. Even to this day, a farm of sorts if you will. Where some of the best young men and football players in the state  are grown. So it stands to reason, that because both – grass and football players – grow so well out there, there must be something about that dirt. 

Not just organic. 

But truly medicinal in nature. 

Sure we have ice packs, tape, pro-wrap, pads and band-aids. 

But we also got that dirt. 

In that pail.

So the next time things don’t go your way, there are moments of anxiety, disappointment and just plain fear, take some. 

If you find yourself making more than your fair share of mistakes and feeling sorry for yourself, help yourself to a pinch. 

Have bruises on top of bruises?   Aches ?  Pains ? Scrapes? Boo boos? Or just plain worn out ? 

Grab a handful and apply some to where it hurts. 

Just think of what that grass goes through; getting walked on, run across, torn up, scuffed, staked, driven over, flooded and frozen each winter. And yet, it still just wants to keep coming back. 

Sort of what young men and football players are meant to do too. 

So when those times come – and they will – you need some. I will make sure the pail will be there. Filled with that  dark, rich, 100% Lemke Park dirt. 

Soil that is home to the best piece of grass in town. 

And all of you.  

The finest young men and football players around.

Location

In a conversation at work some time ago, the phrase “location, location, location” came into play.  

Nothing to do with its inherent real estate connotation. But more so how one maintains a sense of presence in the real estate they happen to occupy in this moment. Not just where they find themselves.  But more to the point, how they find themselves where they are now. Not in a week, month or year.   

Now.  

‘Cause when it comes down to it, if you aren’t here, then you cannot access what is to be gained from the moment.  Not that each moment is going to be an epiphany.  That is never the case.  It is just that each moment has within it the capacity to become an epiphany.  

A surprise.  Never expected.  Life changin’.  

An epiphany.  

It seems to me that there is a human tendency to believe that moments that seem  a mistake, reflect a poor decision or turn out to be a failure are lost causes.  A chance lost.  Something not meant to be. Better left behind than kept, discerned and understood. 

Nothing could be further from the truth.

Everything we encounter in our lives has meaning.  A purpose.   A reason to be.  And yet because things are not precisely what we imagined, we think all is lost.  Wasted effort, commitment and direction.  

We choose to  leave the moment and  place ourselves where we wish to be.  A place begotten without the sacrifice, effort, discipline and effort. Then when we awake, and find ourselves at what seems to be the ultimate conclusion, we deflect, ignore, blame and avoid the outcome. 

“Location, location location” has nothing to do with where you are.  It has everything  to do with being fully present where you are right here, right now.  So that you can someday, become all that you were meant to be. 

If you have the presence of mind and soul to capture and keep those multiple instances of missteps, defeat and failure, then you can access the wherewithal to maintain a presence in those moments yet to come. 

And better yet? 

Those made just for you.

Ever outward.

“The first act of leadership is coming to grips with yourself, who you are, where you are, and what is of value to you, and shaping yourself by acts of conscious will into what you want to become.”

FENWICK W. ENGLISH 

To lead others, it is necessary that you are first able to lead yourself. A task that can get the best of most, if you are not quite sure “who” exactly it is that you are leading. 

Coming to grips with yourself – each facet that makes up the “who” you are – demands a high level of self awareness, unvarnished honesty and a measure of forgiveness. Once you have completed a thorough, yet loving,  self assessment then you are in a better position to begin the work that is needed to make a present reality meet the future vision. 

Each of us is a work in progress.   

For there is always capacity for growth, improvement and actualization. Besides, becoming what you were intended to be isn’t an overnight affair. Never.  It takes time, guts, perseverance and a measure of “want to” to will yourself into becoming the best version of that person you see in  the mirror. 

As time goes by, it won’t just be you seeing that reflection. Others will be drawn in  to take a  look too and see what the fuss is all about. 

Through seeing you, witnessing and experiencing your efforts, they will want to try to embrace a glimpse of what could be them should they choose to follow your lead. They will want to learn, understand and then share in that very process. So that they know from the source  how one can shape and will oneself into that best version of themselves. 

They will welcome and  benefit from seeing you fail and learning from your mistakes so that they may do the same.  They will relish and  appreciate the wisdom you provide on your journey  as they work towards their own goals on theirs. 

Leading yourself first in an open and honest fashion ultimately leads others to do the same.

Shaping all by acts of a conscious will into what you choose to  become. 

So they may as well. 

Forever spreading ever outward.

Seize it.

“carpe diem, quam minimum credula”…

….or ‘Pluck the day, trusting as little as possible in the future’.

Ever since Horace first penned this phrase, the passage of time seems to have weathered it. Worn it down. To make it more succinct and quote worthy.

Eventually, pruned down to roll off the tongue, becoming simply “Carpe Diem.”

A precise intention; a thoughtful command meant to spur one to “seize the day”.However, when you think about it, far too often, the day will seize us. 

That is,we permit it to do so.

We have all allowed this to happen at some point in our lives. An experience consisting of equal parts trial, tribulation and anguish, leaving one feeling twisted up and wrung out. Letting things – or days – happen to us leaves one disappointed, frustrated and full of anxiety for what will surely follow.

Once seized by a day, or a succession of them, one is led to a residence of “existence”. Not living. A place where just getting by and through it is all there is. Being seized by these days can only lead one to live in dread of what the next day will bring our way.

Yet even our overcast, rainy or stormy days have their value. They are part of a larger purpose and plan. They are meant to test our mettle.

Even in the darkest of days, there is still light to be found. It just happens to be obscured for the moment. With an eye guided by wisdom, some patience and the will to press on – even if it means taking the smallest of steps – one can still find something positive and lasting.

Progress can be made. Growth can occur.

So seize onto that one ray of light, if only by the fingertips. Hold on.

Wait it out.

Fronts do pass.

Commit to make it your mission, to discover something special in each day, to seize every moment within it; to go “all in” – with both feet. Even if it is baby steps. Just put one in front of the other and give it your absolute best.

It is in having this level of courage to move forward that will crack open the clouds and emit the rays of light on your efforts; both from within and without.

You will begin to see a way. You will be warmed and energized by the sense of accomplishment; rewarded for your perseverance by the act of simply pressing forward.

And as you continue, your momentum will become too great. It will overcome the inertia of the day. It will relent. And loosen its grip on you.

Like Robert Frost once said: “The best way out is always through.” Seizing the day – if by only grabbing a small corner of it – is as energizing as it is affirming. As your grip on it increases, new possibilities and opportunities will emerge. Like the adventure story waiting to be written, you will now want to see how it ends.

Butterflies of excitement and anticipation flock to overtake the nausea of fear and dread.

As you seize the day, and each one that follows, you will be making the future.

For it is what you make of this moment – the present – that determines what is yet to come.

“What you are becoming is what you will some day be”.

So “pluck the day, trusting as little as possible to the future”.

If you can understand the value that lies in act of the “plucking”, you have most likely already entrusted the future to those efforts you undertake in the present.

Think about it. There will be no ambiguity in what lies ahead.

No gray areas.

For you are choosing it now.

At this very moment.

But only if you “carpe diem”.

It just is.

“I have been impressed with the urgency of doing. Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Being willing is not enough; we must do.” 

— Leonardo Da Vinci

At some point, action is required.

It just is. 

And you must “do.” 

It is a trait of leadership to be able to not only recognize this vacuum but pour yourself into it. That singular  moment that must be met and filled. With effort. Commitment. And character. 

There is no manual, class or team dinner game sheet that will tell you when. 

You just have to be fully embraced in it, be aware of it, and respond. 

You may fail once, twice or ten times. 

But simply knowing when the moment arrives and knowing what to do will not suffice. 

It is not enough. 

You must simply do. 

It just is.